From the Artist: This was my first attempt after not having painting for more than 25 years. It's based on a plein air charcoal sketch I did in 1977. Much of the painting is somewhat contrived. The grasses aren't indigenous to Florida and some details of the trees aren't true. For instance, the bark of these small trees is actually darker and steely gray and the leaves are more of a dark olive monochrome rather than the varied lighter greens I have depicted –- and much less lush. In real life this type of tree is also somewhat aged by salty ocean winds and seems to be pulled to the earth by a stronger force of gravity than normal.
I recognize some composition problems. I don't particularly like the hard horizontal line dividing the grassy area from the background tree line. The foliage of the "subject" trees also obscures too much of the background. I think the trees could also be placed slightly more toward the foreground – they don't seem to be particularly well placed in the overall perspective of the painting. I'm anxious to hear any constructive criticism before attempting this same subject again (with the benefit of hindsight).
From the Painting Guide: It's a painter's privilege to construct nature as you like; there's no 'rule' which says it must match reality. It's an advantage painting has over photography. What is it that bothers you (contrived has very negative connotations)? Is it that some naturalist is going to say "that's not real!" or is it because you were trying to replicate the actual colors/shapes and didn't quite get there? If it's the former, it's a question of having confidence in yourself as a painter; if it's the latter, draw up a list of what you want to achieve and try again (keep this painting to refer back to).
One reason the "hard horizontal line" is bothersome is that it divides the painting exactly in half. Try placing this higher or lower. The middle tree is also central, so this painting is too balanced around the horizontal and vertical axes. Although there are several different layers in the painting – trees, background trees, sky – all have the same apparent outline (the clouds follow the edges of the trees) which creates a feeling of unnaturalness. As does having the three trees in a row. The foreground needs either a sense of movement or more of a sense of perspective (there's a great feeling of distance in the background trees).
I recognize some composition problems. I don't particularly like the hard horizontal line dividing the grassy area from the background tree line. The foliage of the "subject" trees also obscures too much of the background. I think the trees could also be placed slightly more toward the foreground – they don't seem to be particularly well placed in the overall perspective of the painting. I'm anxious to hear any constructive criticism before attempting this same subject again (with the benefit of hindsight).
From the Painting Guide: It's a painter's privilege to construct nature as you like; there's no 'rule' which says it must match reality. It's an advantage painting has over photography. What is it that bothers you (contrived has very negative connotations)? Is it that some naturalist is going to say "that's not real!" or is it because you were trying to replicate the actual colors/shapes and didn't quite get there? If it's the former, it's a question of having confidence in yourself as a painter; if it's the latter, draw up a list of what you want to achieve and try again (keep this painting to refer back to).
One reason the "hard horizontal line" is bothersome is that it divides the painting exactly in half. Try placing this higher or lower. The middle tree is also central, so this painting is too balanced around the horizontal and vertical axes. Although there are several different layers in the painting – trees, background trees, sky – all have the same apparent outline (the clouds follow the edges of the trees) which creates a feeling of unnaturalness. As does having the three trees in a row. The foreground needs either a sense of movement or more of a sense of perspective (there's a great feeling of distance in the background trees).